My Web Site - My Girls

My Girls

Inspiration

People regularly ask writers where they find their inspiration. I find mine where I've found almost everything else of lasting value -- in the hearts and minds of my two magnificent daughters.

Kerry and Vanessa are not just my genetic offspring. They are my best friends and my heroes. Each of them have qualities and potential I admire as a person, not just as a mother. And not a day, not an hour, not a minute goes by that I'm not grateful to have been a part of their lives.

For more pictures of Kerry and Vanessa together, click HERE.

Inspired by the poetry of death in her college literature class, 3/02.

Kerry

Kerry Amanda Halls was born on November 20, 1982 in the warm embrace of Southern California's Santa Anas. Driving past lush, agricultural fields in full-on labor, I caught the scent of ripening strawberries and felt my tummy rumble, just above the contractions. To this day, I'm convinced that's why she loves those juicy berries. Maybe she caught a whiff of them too.

Everything about Kerry is as sweet and honest as that moment, though, rest assured, she is not always as gentle as a coastal breeze. She can be a tornado if her survival depends on it. But I'm as proud of her whipped up and frenzied as I am when she's quiet and at peace.

Kerry spent her teens pierced -- in five places, not counting the triplets in both ears. She has self-designed tattoos on both her wrists and at the small of her back. People who ddidn't know better assumed she was modified the look of her body to fit in. They were wrong. "I don't do it to prove I'm like anyone," she once said to me. "I do it to set myself apart."

Today, at 25, she is a literature student at Washington State University, about a year from graduation. Because I couldn't afford tuition, and because her grandfather could only help so much, she's had to work hard to stay in school, first while working at Auntie's Bookstore, now at a fun little kitch store called Boo Radley's. It hasn't been easy to balance her life, but Kerry has always risen to every challenge. Ever her GPA is great.

Once she graduates, Kerry hopes to be a writer -- preferably not starving as her mother has been. I have every faith she'll do better in every respect than I did. She's and her sweetie, Adrian Workman are a wonderful couple, sharing a great apartment and three cats. Her future is as bright as she is.

Her relationship with Vanessa is a remarkable thing to behold. She was always a second mother to Vanessa, because of the seven year age difference. And she still is today. When I have to be out of town, Kerry steps up to help Vanessa with whatever she needs. And she's needed so much. But beyond that, Kerry and Vanessa are great, great friends. They truly love and like one another. And I'm so grateful they do.

Kerry is the sum total of all the good and bad she's been through -- the spirit of survival, the diamond born of pressure crushed coal. And I am proud to be her mother. Grateful our challenges left her smart and cautious instead of narrow and cold.

More pictures of Kerry.

ViVi & Gulag, by Vanessa Halls, 07

Vanessa

Believe it or not, my "baby" is just a few weeks from turning 18. And what a remarkable young woman she has turned out to be. She's far more responsible than her mother ever was, and far brighter, too. As Crutcher says, "She's off the charts smart, that girl." And I couldn't agree more.

Her aspirations to be an artist haven't changed. She still hopes to create artwork for video game applications. But she's also developed a great talent for photography. She'll go from Shadle Park High School to Spokane Falls Community College to participate in their award winning photography department for her AA.

A medical shocker rocked our world in January. What we thought was a corn or a callous turned out to be a tumor. It was removed January 14. But for several weeks, the pathology was unclear. After study at Harvard Medical, the results came back -- benign. So cancer isn't on her horizon. Her doctor does plan to write a paper on the tumor, though. It was that unusual.

One good thing about the tumor, it brought Vanessa and her Dad back together. After almost three years of silence, they're talking again, learning to be close in a whole new way. And that's wonderful. The past is behind us. Why not make the here and now all it can be? She is very happy with this turn of events, and that makes me happy. So here's hoping.

Did I mention Vanessa is one HECK of a gamer? She is. She's a firecracker when it comes to vids. And she's started two novels I think will be good enough to publish. I told you -- off the charts.

Yup. My Vanessa is a beautiful, brilliant wonder. I'm so proud of her. So proud she calls me Mom.

My girls have surpassed me, artistically, as you can see -- just the way nature had it planned. Color me happy.

Just Me

I grew up in Texas, New Jersey, Colorado, California, Utah, and finally, in Spokane. I learned -- from parents that truly loved me -- to be kind and smart, but afraid. From these miraculous young people I call my children, I've learned how to be nonjudgemental and brave. I love them both with all my heart. They've taught me how to believe in love.